Memoirs of a Geisha

Dave and I just watched Memoirs a week or so ago and it struck me very powerfully.  I had read it years ago, but seeing the movie reminded me.  It was just so clear that we can't judge people for the "choices" they make, because everyone's choices have a back story.  As I watched Chiyo try to survive each impossible circumstance, I asked myself if I felt she could have made any other decision.  The answer seemed to me to be no  As a child she and her sister were sold because of her mother's illness and her father's inability to take care of them.  Chiyo's sister, Satsu, was sold to a brothel, and Chiyo was sold to a Geisha house.  Satsu was able to run away, but Chiyo was never able to escape. The main Geisha in the house, Hotsumomo, was very jealous of Chiyo and her potential, so she abused her terribly.  As a young girl, Chiyo catches the eye of the Chairman.  Unbeknownst to Chiyo, he has Mameha, an even more powerful Geisha from another house, take her under her wing and try to help her.  Eventually, Chiyo becomes the most famous, sought after Geisha.  This fame seemed to solidify her future, as a Geisha.  This means a comfortable living per se, but forever dependent on men for her survival.  WWII forever changes her trajectory, but it ends up well, I guess, for Chiyo.  Happy and Sad.  Each decision made by Chiyo was only made for current and future survival.

Isn't that what we all do?  Don't we all make decisions that seem like the best decision at the time.  We base our choices on the information we have at the time and weigh it slowly and carefully, or sometimes instantly.  But, our overall goal is just to ease our pain, or help us get something we need.  Those decisions are also based on our experiences and past successes or failures.  When I think about choices I have made in my life, the big ones especially, they all have a back story.  If ever I would share a past choice I made, especially one that was particularly painful, I would want to share the back story so the listener would hopefully understand my choice and judge me less harshly.  When I see other people now, friends or strangers, I recognize that I only see them in a snapshot of time in their lives.  I always wonder what I would see if I could somehow see their back story and understand how and why they are the way they are, would I see their choices in a new light?  Would I be more loving and accepting?  The answer has to be a whole-hearted yes.  So, perhaps as I catch further momentary glimpses into the lives of others, I can be more understanding and kind just knowing that they do have a history and a reason for their choices.  We all do.